Thursday, July 24

Feeling a Bit Funky

It has been an interesting couple of days- I had tried to add a new medication for my Cardiomyopathy (an ace inhibitor) and I could only last five days before I had to stop. The drug made me extremely nauseated at first, and after the first two days my blood pressure began to drop. I was becoming more and more sleepy and I wasn't up for much of anything. By the last day (the last straw!) my blood pressure was down to 82/52 and I couldn't stop crying. This was not the answer for me and I couldn't get off of it fast enough. Before I began this drug I had been getting stronger on just the Beta Blocker I had been prescribed, and I was able to exercise more than I had in almost three years. Well, the ace inhibitor seems to have thrown my hormones out of whack because I keep feeling like my period is going to show up and I have a hard time with my energy levels. Some days I am okay, and by the next day I am feeling tired and in need of rest. The worst part of all of this is my emotional state. For those of you that are dealing with health issues, I know that you understand. Especially hormonal ones. I have been very, very sensitive to everything the last few days, and I am on the verge of tears several times a day. One would think that they were having a breakdown, but I know better. This is my body's way of trying to right itself. I truly believe that it wants to have all of my systems in perfect harmony, and that I just have to give it the time and acceptance to do its job and heal itself. It's not always easy though. I get scared wondering if I will feel good again; then I remember that I have to stay in the faith, and the fear thankfully passes. I have to trust that my heart is on the mend and that my Fibromyalgia is on it's way out the door. It has taken me three years to get that I have a choice in the matter- that I don't have to roll over and give up, telling myself that I will always be ill. I have learned about too many success stories from people who were once seriously ill and are now healthy and strong to let myself believe that somehow I am different. I am not different- if they can get better than I can too! This is the thought that keeps me going, and I hope that it can help you keep going as well.

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